GUANICA REVISITED/BOOK REVIEW

THE TRIP was unenventful, concrete, asphalt too many cars.. However, the scenery is pretty green for this time of the year. Particularly once going down the freeway
after Cayey towards Salinas. It has been unusually rainy thanks to El NINHO?

It rained twice while hanging out at Marylee's. Rain is always pleasant, a great bonus in Guanica, our desert region, with thirty inches of rain a year. The rain made things different. There were puddles in the low areas that get flooded from the Caribbean, increased by the rains.


The next day in my one hour stroll, I noticed five birds hanging out, never seen before.

Three fifty feet high, dead coconut palms, about 12 inches in diameter, with ocean views had been converted in a Puerto Rican woodpecker condo. Violinists crabs gave us a welcome, as soon as the stroll began... Running quickly away and hiding , something a little difficult considering the size of their only pince.

At one point while passing under som Mesquite trees, I was attacked by a swarm of
mosquitos. This had never happened before and certainly influenced by the previous rains.

In the south the vegetation by the ocean is somewhat different from the north. Guaicum, Mesquite, Thespesia Populnea, Portulacas and Paspalum
tend to dominate. Up north is Terminalia Catappa and Cocolova uvifera.
However someone is planting these two species lately. Pine trees are found in both. Palms trees are also predominant in the north, looking odd and out of place in Canha Gorda, the public beach, where I counted just twenty. However, if you move to the 450 bucks a night resort Copamarina, next door, the opposite is true. Too many ridiculous palms and turf on top!

In these area Bouganvilleas, Royal Poincianas, Endemic frangipani, some
varities of cacti, Almacigos, are the protagonists in the surrounding scenery. Road kill: one frog and crab. That is what I saw.

A couple of good news. After my criticism of the pig style PORTABLE TOiLETS in CANHA GORDA improvement is noted. This time they had twelve inches to get to the rim. That is some progress, considering the puking as figure of speech horrendous, experience in the biggest island public beach, Luquillo, reviewed here and also on Tripadvisor, a tourist site.

Canha Gorda was immaculate, since it has a few palms, no seeds, fronds,
or garbage visible during our visit, except for abundant algae. I suggest to recycle these organic matter considering the amount of it in both beaches.

BOOK REVIEW
THE WAY I DO IT

IN PUERTO RICO there is a JESTER without a COURT, agronomist, tv personality that I have been listening/watching for the last five years. Has a b i g shaved head,
a NOSFERATU without fangs and eye glasses. A squeaky, irritating voice, body language and speech patterns of a hick.

Once he built a pond two feet from the driveway of the poor resident in a former tv show. I bet that poor soul has sunk the front right tires in it more than once, under the influence or sober. Next, our country hero built an interior fountain with sandstone, as if he was a mason. Since he is not, it looks suspiciously as a tombstone.

Recently, he has published his third book, with the mentioned tittle above or something close. I look at it and it is a nightmare, a bad trip for only $35.95, a piece of shit. Poor, rough paper, unfriendly font, bad quality pictures, repetitive information. It seems that no sense of some
fundamental, elementary sense of aesthetics is present in this printed pages or the gardens
suggested.

But that is nothing, since it is just appearance, an a book shall not be judged on the cover. BUT wait, it gets worse.. The diagrams of the gardens he 'designs' are also in the book, the quality
of the drawing is fifth grade. There are no PICTURES of his private garden, or a list of the plants he cultivates, or any project installation during the 21 years!, this chumy saint, has ruined the aesthetics of the island with grass, palms and bromeliads, among his favorites.

ONE of the worst sins, this buffoon makes public, is the TOTAL infatuation with turf. THE PLEASURE he FEELS when he sees and smell turf... and surely the bundle of money he and his partner GONZALEZ BAUZA, his accomplice and ecoenvironmental criminal from GRAMAS LINDAS, make to the unsuspected, foolish customer buying into this farce, of the pretty, luscious turf. NO mention of the pollution required, created in its maintenance. Or good will for
the people, flora and fauna, ways to maintain it without pollution OF ANY KIND.

There is no references at all, too bad. No gratitude to the exploited employees, that make him and his partners what they are. No profit sharing. The end thank GOD, the last pages, are full of some lengthy botanical list, that he does not use in his installations, propagate or have ever seen. The list would certainly mean nothing to the innocent, gullible, ignorant, souls willing to waste such amount of money (35.95) plus tax, for free advice already in the internet...The name of the author? Interested, drop us a comment or write: caliotropis@gmail.com

The one who should not be mentioned, not here. Puerto Rican islanders with a little usable brain will guess from the portrait/picture. If you readers, out there, in the five continents really need to know, probably get a good laugh/tears, in Spanish... if you think I exagerate, let me know, and I will provide the reference. Until then....